It’s been exactly a year since I began my healing journey. It's been a long ride with lots of twists, turns, and growth, and guess what? I am excited to introduce you to the final pages of the Traumatic Breakup chapter of my story! I can write this from a place of forgiveness and acceptance because I was able to truly move on. The traumatic aspect of the breakup At the end of our relationship, I blamed myself. I have an incredibly big heart, and I gave every ounce of love, respect, and kindness I had to my ex. If you’d read my journals through those three years, even if I was mad at him, ...
Relationships & Love
My Step-by-Step Guide to Letting Go
One of the most difficult parts of dealing with a broken heart is letting go. When we start dating someone, we attach to them with our minds, bodies, and souls. Together, a couple creates memories, inside jokes, and make promises to each other. They build a little shelter-world together that protects from the outside world. Sharing space together and living together makes the bond and attachment even stronger with each passing day. But disagreements, conflict, and betrayal cause breakups. Sometimes it’s nothing but paths heading separate directions that causes a split. When a couple goes ...
I Hit the Point of No Return
Earlier in the summer, I woke up with glee because I thought I had moved on from my previous relationship. It was my first time waking up and going to bed without thinking about my ex. I was focused on my books, my plans for my blogs, and my dreams of future goals. It was an exhilarating moment. What I didn’t know is that there are levels to moving on: First, there’s the stage that I was excited to be in earlier this summer.We can call that the beginning to move on. You’re feeling good, thinking about other things, entertaining the idea of casual dating.Then there’s the “Hm, maybe we can ...
What Love Looks Like to Me Now
I used to think I knew what love looked like. My idea of love was a mixture of rom-coms, romance novels, country and old-school R&B songs, and some really toxic ideas. I thought that love meant that I was supposed to give every part of myself to my significant other. Love was supposed to be a perfect all-consuming emotion. I was supposed to accept everything that my partner did or didn’t do. I was not supposed to complain or ask for respect and have boundaries. I was supposed to make excuses for them if they got violent. I was supposed to build up the man I was with and do everything ...
The Most Important Relationship
Which relationship is the most important relationship in your life? If you answered with your significant other or parents and siblings or best friend... not quite. Yes, those are all important relationships, but who is most important? You! I've struggled with that concept for years. Learning about codependency and the fact that I've been plagued with it my entire life was more than eye-opening. Understanding that I have issues with codependency unlocked an opportunity to make some major changes. What is codependency? It's marked by: low self-esteempeople-pleasingpoor ...
Moving On
warning: excessive use of the word "bruh" in this post. you've been warned. I did the most unthinkable and unimaginable thing in the world. The part of my healing journey that began last November... might actually be complete. Forgive my use of slang but... BRUH. BRUH. I am shocked. The light at the end of the tunnel was not a train! This morning, I thought about the future first as I woke up. I am giddy and excited because I got signed up for a Victim Advocacy Certification Course yesterday. After I complete that, I'm getting a certification in trauma counseling. I looked at all the ...
