I truly expected to be fine afterward. I thought that a week of alone time, plus meeting some really wonderful people would change my outlook forever. Don't get me wrong, going on a trip and making new friends made a huge difference. Prior to going, I'd forgotten what it was like for people to text and make plans with me. It was so nice to be appreciated and accepted by my new friends, and I'm happy that we keep in contact now. In meeting them, I got a good reminder that I was not a bad person. I think my soul searching trip did everything in terms of reading self-help books, dancing a ...
music festival
Healing Journey – Part 1
Hi, it’s been a while since I’ve posted. I took a break to gather myself. My tears have dried. After a couple of mopey days, I got up, washed my face, and in true Iris-fashion whipped out a notebook and pen. I got to work writing down how I felt and listing the choices I wanted to make. The best choice I’ve made so far? Sobriety. Instead of numbing, isolating, and avoiding, I chose to go on this journey sober. I’m stronger because of it. I believe that wholeheartedly. That speaks to how far I’ve come as a person. Not even a year ago, I would have drowned my sorrows and pain with ...
Challenge 1 Complete
I did it! I went to Electric Island Festival with two friends, and had a great time! We danced, drank, and I managed my anxiety pretty well. It was extremely packed for such a small venue. I'm glad we took the shuttle bus. It made getting there and getting home so much easier. I enjoyed myself so much! I haven't put on festival makeup, a funky outfit, and danced to some good EDM music in such a long time. It felt good doing something that was both challenging fun for myself! Fortunately, there were only two things that got the old anxiety going. The first thing that got ...
Challenge 1
Let’s dive right into my first challenge. I’m not shy about discussing my mental health. I have Generalized Anxiety Disorder, coupled with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, and a few other things that we’ll get into another time. I have a fixation onfeeling safe and un-stressed at all times. If I don’t, I have panic attacks. We’re talking the sweating buckets, racing heart, unable to breathe, feeling like the world is closing in on me kind. I end up staying home a lot and sometimes missing big events in other’s lives because I simply can’t handle the stress of being in a loud or crowded ...
